The Fig File: NY Loves Bailouts (And So Should We).
Whatever you think about bailouts, that new term of deliverance that has become part of our daily economic commiseration, the truth is if the Fed hands out one then everybody is going to want their own. You know: the ol’ buy your older son a present on your younger son’s birthday to keep the peace routine. Like a begrudging sibling, the The Tri-State watched as the twins Fannie and Freddie Mac as well as AIG got their birthday baubles. Soon after, big brother Detroit Automaker was asking for a belated multi billion dollar best wishes check too. This left the Brass in our Big Three States scratching the bristles on their chin thinking: how can we cash in on all the free parking monopoly money being handed out?
Solution: Dire threats.
After Governor Paterson, Corzine and Rell had a meeting of the minds with President Elect Obama in Philadelphia, the new fandango coming out of Albany, Trenton and Hartford was that without Federal aid, the fallout for the Tri-State would be disastrous featuring unprecedented cuts in services, education, reductions in health care spending and....wah wah wah wah wah.
But the whining and passive-aggressive threats seems to have worked. A report released by Senator Chuck Schumer (D-NY) says that $800 billion economic stimulus package proposed by The President Elect would hand New York State and City 5 Billion dollars for Medicaid; 20 billion of it would go to National Mass Transit.
Now my wheels started turning. 20 billion towards our Nations transit system which definetly guarantees our city a chunk of that for it’s ailing transportation agency. My birthday isn’t until August Uncle Sam, but here’s what I want: A bailout, some aid, stimulation, a deliverance for New York’s Metropolitan Transit Agency so we the commuter do not have to pay the proposed 100% increase on our Metrocards or navigate our way through EZ Pass Lanes on our freebie bridges. The money would wipe the slate clean for Lee Sander and Co. with one caveat: the Federal tax payer money given to the MTA is under strict Military supervision; and by chance if the money is misplaced, misspent, misused, misguided or just missing, those who are in charge of distributing, book keeping and overseeing the money within the MTA should be subject to a military tribunal. The guilty should be tried, sentenced and jailed the same day with a mandatory 300 year sentence with no possibility of parole all to be served in NY State’s Sing Sing prison’s worst yard: B-Block with my cousin Jack as their C.O.
Through this we avoid fare hikes and toll increases while gaining the power to hold the MTA accountable for their finances. How could you not love that kind of bailout?
Odds and Ends: The Beat Goes On: My friend Writer and Journalist Pat Fenton’s play Jack’s Last Call is hitting the road making a stop here in New York - right around where Jack Kerouac stalked the streets and watched people pass in the night lights. I have read his script and listened to the audio performance of the play; bottom line is that this as close as you will ever get to hanging out with and peering into the mind of Jack Kerouac. Pat’s effort is one that literary minds, theater creatures and guys looking to impress their gals are going to want to see. I will be there on Saturday so please come out as well.
Jack’s Last Call
January 10 at 7 PM
Theater for the New City
155 First Avenue
(between 9th and 10th Streets)
New York, NY 10003
Telephone: (212) 254-1109
E-mail Mike Here
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